Cowboy Calm

by blogasana on April 28, 2010


Last night in two dreams a huge, frightening bull was making horrible sounds of terror and attacking cows in the field.

In both dreams, the bull was at a distance and didn’t see me… wasn’t chasing me, but I awoke with heart pounding.

In the second dream, a cowboy on a horse rode up the hill toward the bull. Because the bull was higher on the hill, it looked three times the size of the horse.

I started to panic—the bull was snorting and preparing the charge. It seemed like it would take out the horse and cowboy.

But the cowboy stayed very calm. He even nudged the horse a step closer.

He reached over to the tie on the saddle and got his whip (which was a flat, blue rope… not very whip-like).

It seemed like he was saying something to the bull, but I couldn’t hear.

And then the bull started to calm down.

And I woke up.


I haven’t done the voices for a dream in quite a while. These dreams, and that enormous bull, are so vivid and surely hold some good insight. So here we go…


Holy shit that bull is HUGE
It’s going to hurt someone
Is it going to hurt me?
It sounds like it’s in pain
It’s a horrible, tortured, scary sound


I’m mad
I’m mad
I’m mad
Mad at everything
This cowboy doesn’t seem to want to hurt me


Big bull
I’ve seen lots of big bulls
He’s a grizzly one, might have to use my rope
Come on bull, let’s not make this difficult
I’ll just wait till yer done


A couple of things really stand out.

First, the bull wasn’t attacking me, yet I was freaking out. This brings up two ideas: 1) too much taking on for other people; and 2) panic and fear over what could happen. Both of these things resonate loudly right now.

The second thing is I wouldn’t even imagine another way to see the bull besides threatening and scary. But the cowboy is not impressed by yet another big, mad bull.


Let me give you a little background on me and cowboys. I grew up with them. My dad was one. I dated one (ok, several).

Here’s what I remember about real cowboys:

  • They are not impressed by your new car, business degree, or big mean bull
  • They do humble, honest work… hard work
  • They live simple lives
  • They enjoy their downtime (which usually involves a few beers and a gun)
  • They are Macgyver in a big hat and boots — can fix anything with rope, a fancy knot, a can of Skoal, and a pocketknife
  • They’d do anything for you, whether you’re a neighbor or a guy on the side of the road
  • Their butts look so cute in Wranglers. Oh, I guess that’s not relevant here.

For for these reasons, I declare the Cowboy as my Trail Guide.

Sometimes you need a Negotiator. Sometimes you need an Advocate. Right now I need a Trail Guide. Someone who can navigate rough terrain, will work hard without a bunch of fuss, who will go up ahead and sweet talk the big mean bull out of the road. Part consultant, part mentor, part chaperone.

Life is an adventure. Might as well keep company with someone with a cute butt.

Come on, Cowboy. Let’s go.

{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }

srslyliz April 28, 2010 at 11:53 pm

All I got out of this was the mental image of cute cowboy butts. And I am not complaining. Thank you.


Kidding! I love this exercise you did of dissecting your dream. I may have to try it out.


Erin May 2, 2010 at 7:24 pm

Love, love it. I could use a no-nonsence cowboy/trail-guide about now, we probably all could. It’s about safety for me.

Great imagery; you’re a good dreamer!

Lots of love,


janeen April 29, 2010 at 3:19 am

my take was: ‘what did you eat before bed? a triple scoop banana split?’ that would send me straight into a night of angry bulls!


Leili April 29, 2010 at 6:05 am

Right on.


Jacquelyn April 29, 2010 at 11:10 am

I can picture him hog-tying the bull, rounding up the cattle, tying the hay bales and whipping up a western omelet. All while I watch that cute butt.


Bob April 29, 2010 at 3:15 pm

Apparently, there is cowboy butt and then there is Cowboy Butt. One being much closer to the divine than the other. Who knew?

I’m sure you are already familiar with it, but read Mary Oliver’s poem “The Journey” that Kim posted on her blog.


blogasana April 29, 2010 at 9:35 pm

@liz – you…. ;-) Do try the dream thing – you find out crazy stuff about what’s *really* on your mind!

@janeen – sometimes, but not that night! and i realized this is my 2nd dream about bulls. mmm. buncha crap!

@leili – ya!

@jacquelyn – mmm, i can see it too! :-)

@bob – you are right!! i must specify which “cowboy butt” i’m talking about! =) yes, that poem is amazing….


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