a stroke of her hair…

by michelle on October 27, 2011

Many years ago I had a friend who was going through a lonely time. Probably post-break up. Or maybe just the torture of being in your twenties.

She told me how sometimes when she couldn’t sleep she would tickle her own arm or stroke her hair.

I remember thinking it was kind of sad that she had to rely on herself (remember, I was in my 20s…). Little did I know the wisdom of this gesture of self love, tenderness, and affection. Taking care of oneself.

I think fondly of my friend and her cure for her blues. This poem reminds me of that generosity:

I’ve always wanted a guardian angel.
One named Sam (short for Samuel).
Maybe he would wear a hat like Jimmy Stewart in
It’s A Wonderful Life.
He’d have wise advice
on men and financial matters.
I probably never would have gone back to
The Cheater if he’d been around.
It would be nice to know he was with me
when walking through a parking lot at night,
or when feeling alone in my grief and worry.
Waking at 3 am, the cares of a woman’s heart
so sharp and heavy,
Sam would be there and he’d stroke my hair
until I went back to sleep.


What can you offer yourself? What are you longing for that’s as close as your own giving? Do you have a guardian angel? Please share…


{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }

Madeleine October 28, 2011 at 8:29 am

Who wrote this wonderful poem?



Leili Learning Life October 29, 2011 at 12:05 am

There’s something about offering yourself hospitality. Not just being polite to yourself, but really making yourself feeling welcomed and at home. Putting nice soaps in the bathroom, warming your robe in the dryer after a bath. Heating up your slippers or socks, too. Maybe spritzing lavender oil on the pillows after setting the coziest blankets on the bed. A carafe of herbed water on the nightstand. Affording yourself some extra time in the morning, knowing that while there may be many things to see or do, maybe you just want to do nothing. Or read. Serving yourself a special bowl of fruit in the morning.

Those things that are so nice to do for other people — as close as your own giving.


michelle November 2, 2011 at 11:20 am

those are such sweet gestures, leili. i love it. treating yourself like the special guest you are!


Susan Davis November 14, 2011 at 7:28 pm

My guardian angel is a wonderful, wise woman who I imagine to be in her late sixties and talks to me from a beautiful, lush, overgrown garden that is always warm and sunny, no matter what time of day or night. I think she’s Jewish and lived in New York before becoming an angel! I really need to visit her more often. Thanks for the reminder!


michelle November 16, 2011 at 12:14 am

that is so beautiful, susan… thank you so much for sharing it. xoxo


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